The Customer Is Not Always Right
August 20th, 2008 | Published in Authenticity In Entrepreneurship | 17 Comments
Yesterday, someone took advantage of me. A customer came into my business nation and took advantage of me. And, I’m sure you know the type… the person who is ultimately looking for something for nothing. In this case, this person ended up getting a few somethings for nothing from me.
And the part that really cracks me up is, in the middle of this person taking advantage of me, she had the audacity to ask me for help with a challenge she was having in her business.
There are people like this in the world and that is quite unfortunate. These people seek out those they can scam or take advantage of, and they do it. And they don’t really seem to feel bad about it.
The really interesting part is, most of the time they are business owners themselves. Now, usually, they aren’t successful business owners - because someone who is going to take advantage of another business owner usually doesn’t have the right mind-set to make their own business a success no matter how many products and services they scam the rest of us out of.
I’m not saying that if your business isn’t where you want it to be, or you’re having challenges that you take advantage of people. I’m saying that usually, people who take advantage of people aren’t creating the success that they want because they don’t have the right mind-set to create it - no matter how much information, resources, or help they get for free.
Now, don’t get me wrong - I have my moments. I have my screw ups. And sometimes, I’m just plain wrong. And I am fully ready to take responsibility for those situations. But in this situation, I wasn’t wrong. I did everything right. This person, just saw an opportunity to basically screw me out of paying for 3 products. And yeah, I know I don’t usually use a lot of harsh language - hope I didn’t offend you. But frankly, I’m still upset about the whole thing.
As business owners, we can’t always say how we feel. We end up biting our tongue when we really want to give someone a piece of our mind.
I want to tell you that, the customer is not always right, and you should not feel bad about thinking that way. And if it comes down to it, you shouldn’t feel bad about asking someone to walk away from your business and never come back.
I also want to give a voice to how it feels when you’re the one being taken advantage of. It sucks. It hurts. It makes you feel awful.
It really hurt me that this person took advantage of me and she knew exactly what she was doing. It hurt that while she was taking advantage of me, she fully expected me to lay down like a doormat and help her with a business challenge. Sorry honey, it doesn’t work like that.
I love what I do. I love the people who step into my business and become part of my community. Anyone who has hung out in this community for a little while knows that. And if I have had the honor of interacting with you - I want you to know that it was truly an honor.
I have a true, deep passion for this - it’s why I create products and services… so that I can help all of you wonderful people and do this as a way to support myself. And it really hurts when someone takes advantage of that.
It’s not healthy for us to accept people like this into our business. Some business owners feel that they should just suck it up and deal with someone like this. No way! Not only is it not good for your emotional health, but it’s not good for your mental health either.
You shouldn’t spend time or energy with people like this any longer than absolutely necessary. Don’t be afraid to let clients and customers go who upset you, or who don’t honor you or your business the way you honor them.
Last night, as I was mulling this over, I remembered a blog post I read earlier this week by Daylle Deanna. In it, she talks about the fact that sometimes, bad things happen, but we always have a choice in how we respond.
So, now that I’ve had a chance to vent (thank you all for listening 
). I’m going to take a lesson from Daylle and choose how I feel moving forward and how I treat this situation. But first…
Hi - person who took advantage of me yesterday (you know who you are), I’m going to ask you to leave my business. You got what you wanted (and then some). Please be on your way. Don’t purchase anything else from me because I will not honor any future requests… and no - I can’t help you with that challenge you had.
Ok - whew! I feel better!
About Jenn Givler
August 20th, 2008 at 1:04 pm (#)
This happens to frequently. I have been telling my clients for many years that a successful business owner takes a good hard look at their customers at least once a year and fires the ones that drain them, don’t make them any money and cause them stress. Every business has enough “good” customers, that they don’t need the “bad” customers.
Take time to weed out the customers that don’t contribute to your businesses success.
August 20th, 2008 at 1:07 pm (#)
Good for you Jenn…
I totally agree and over the years have found many customers are not the type of client I want and likewise with consultants.
As a business owner we do have the right to opt to not service, help or deal with the type of people we don’t want to be our clients!
The joys of owning the business
So, glad you got that off your chest and feel better and know that I, as well as others, totally agree with you!
Tara
August 20th, 2008 at 1:51 pm (#)
Jenn,
This reinforces for me the importance of getting clear about my own boundaries both personally and in business. I think often, we may not be as clear about our boundaries until we feel that they have been crossed. Your thoughts serve as a wonderful reminder for me to get clear on identifying my own boundaries as a proactive step to developing my business. I believe that the clearer I am with these, the more I will attract potential clients who will honor them. Thanks for sharing your experience!
Amy Miyamoto
On Twitter @amymiyamoto
August 20th, 2008 at 2:16 pm (#)
Hey Jenn,
Boy, that sounds like it was a fun adventure… not. Thankfully, this is such a very rare thing.
I’m always so curious about people who make those kinds of choices. I know that, due to human nature, everyone thinks they are making the best choices and doing the best thing they can in the moment, even if later they see it may not have lined up so well.
My parents do the same thing in their retail business. If they catch a customer not treating one of their employees right, or being abusive, or making comments that are racist, sexist, etc, they ask those people to leave and not return.
So- I know you already came to your conclusion on your own, but I just wanted to affirm and support your choice to not give where it doesn’t feel good.
August 20th, 2008 at 2:25 pm (#)
Jenn,
I totally agree with you: the customer is NOT always right. There are so many people who are looking to get something for little or nothing. I don’t have time for those people. Now that you’ve written this post, don’t give anymore energy or thought to it. RELEASE IT. I am a firm believer that what goes around comes back around so they will get theirs and it will probably be a double dose.
August 20th, 2008 at 5:05 pm (#)
Jenn,
Good for you! I think situations such as these force us to remember that when you have passion for what you do, its not all about the money and having as many customers that come through your doors. If we don’t honor ourselves first, we set the precedence for how others will treat us. There are already many lives that have been touched by your passion and still need the services you offer. When we allow ourselves to be abused, it truly drains your passion and leaves you with a lot less to give to those who truly appreciate and are blessed by you. Thanks for sharing!
August 20th, 2008 at 5:13 pm (#)
Way to turn lemons into lemonade, Jenn.
Not only do you get catharsis from venting, we get to learn the much-needed lesson that it’s okay to stand our ground and honor our integrity.
August 20th, 2008 at 8:00 pm (#)
My sympathies, Jenn. I’ve learned that there are those who will go to any length to get what they want, without a bit of concern for those they’re dealing with. The businesses that succeed best do so as much for the owner’s integrity as their business practices, so chances are, she isn’t going to be much of a success, where you will be.
August 21st, 2008 at 1:33 am (#)
Jenn,
It seems that people who do this type of thing are just callous. I actually had a client who wanted to come back after I decided not to work with her any longer after trying to take advantage of me. The bright side is it helped me to focus my business in a direction that has helped to make it stronger in the long run. Here’s hoping the same for you!
August 21st, 2008 at 12:45 pm (#)
WOW!! Thank you all so much for this out-pouring of support! I really appreciate it and I can definitely feel the love!! You guys are awesome!
This issue seems to have touched many people. On one of my discussion groups, someone said “the person who came up with the phrase ‘the customer is always right’ was probably a bad customer.” That made me crack up!
I have to say I love the people that step into my business nation. They are kind, loving, caring… they want success, they are willing to work hard - they are just all around wonderful people. Like Mark said, these bad customers are so rare. And you’re right Mark, everyone feels they’re doing the best they can… even when it looks a bit odd to the rest of us
One thing I’m getting out of the comments you guys are leaving is the boundaries issue.
It’s so important to set boundaries - not just in your business… but in life. And this is just another way they are so important. You can’t be everyone else’s door mat - it just drains your energy. You teach people how to treat you… and if you teach them that it’s ok to step on you, they will. Jen - I love how you talk about the fact that standing our ground really is honoring our integrity.
And Yvonne said something along those lines too about the fact that it starts with us - we have to honor ourselves and our boundaries before anyone else can.
Now that I’ve had a chance to step back and view the situation from the outside (as opposed to being smack in the middle of it), I see it as a lesson in my own boundaries… and a lesson in my focus as well.
I remember a time in my business where I would have let something like this crush me - I would have painted myself as the bad guy and I would have obsessed over what I did wrong to cause this and how I could prevent it in the future. Heck, I might have even shrunk into myself and ceased all business operations until I had time to recover.
Not anymore. I’ve learned a lot about myself as I’ve grown as an entrepreneur. And I now stand firmly in my integrity and I honor myself, my business, and my clients and customers.
Once again - you guys ROCK!! THANK YOU!!
August 21st, 2008 at 1:14 pm (#)
Jenn,
Good for you for setting boundaries! As a proponent of red-carpet customer service, I am all for going the extra mile for your customers. Yet….the customer is NOT always right. In fact, I suggest you put your team first (and if you are a sole proprietor, that means you), your service a close second (and if you treat your team well they will treat your customers well), and your product third.
95% of your customers are worth the red-carpet treatment, extraordinary service and then some! Then there are the 5% who:
Take advantage of your goodwill
Refuse to pay for your products or services
Abuse you or your staff repeatedly
Can’t be satisfied no matter how hard you try
Don’t honor their part of the service commitment (paying bills, submitting items on time, etc.)
That’s when it’s time for some truth telling. In my book, I call it the “Booger Principle.” (You read that right!)
Congratulations on setting boundaries for yourself! Now you’ll have more time and energy to give your typical red-carpet service to customers who truly appreciate you.
August 21st, 2008 at 2:33 pm (#)
What a timely post for me. Last week, I had a “triple-threat-take-advantage-of-another-business-owner” type week. Yes, 3 separate situations like that. My boundaries of what I’ll do and not do came in handy. That’s why it is good to know what your boundaries are in advance. In my case, they aren’t people I’d like as a customer or a business partner.
It reminds me of my decision to discontinue giving free samples for my candle business. I was attracting too many people who wanted something-for-nothing and my product has a greater value than that.
Way to go Jenn! Move forward with your integrity intact and get down to the business at hand.
Savor life’s best,
Aimee
August 21st, 2008 at 4:23 pm (#)
Oh Aimee, I love what you said “my product has a greater value than that”
And if I may add something, YOU are worth more than that!
Jenn, great that you learnt something out of this. I can see you were rip-roaring mad! Time to go to dance class and get rid of that anger.
And then add some new policies to your business manual
I believe that the customer absolutely deserves GREAT service but that ALL interactions must maintain both parties’ dignity. This certainly didn’t so good for you that you can happily release them.
Interestingly, I’ve had a client whose been messing me around for the last 3 - 4 months - not pitching, etc and yesterday I “fired” her. I thought I’d feel bad/ sad but actually, I feel relief. And if she does come back, I told her she’ll have to come back on my terms (increased fees, etc.)
Here’s to new opportunities!
August 22nd, 2008 at 3:03 am (#)
May I add one more story?
Janusz is a custom jewelry designer who also designs for many of the jewelry stores in the northwest suburbs of Chicago. One of his store owner clients requested a mother and child pendant. Janusz designed and created his version of this motif. Two months later, we get a distraught call from one of our customers in this jewelry store’s mailing area. She had received a mailing from “X Thief and CO jewlery store” showing his smiling face and OUR mother and child pendant with the wording very suggestive that he is a custom jewelry designer (not true) and that the piece was his custom design. My solution: We cast this piece in sterling silver and for the next twelve months we made sure to distribute this pendant to as many charities as we could find for use in their fund raising- especially if we could find a charity in “X Thief and Co’s” mailing area…..And , I had the pleasure of calling this *&^% up and telling him that if he wanted anymore jewelry designs from Jjanusz Custom Jewelry Design- his rate had now gone up 50%.
August 22nd, 2008 at 11:59 am (#)
Marcia - I had to laugh when I read your comment… yes, this was definitely worthy of dancing it out! Maybe a little angry hip-hop… LOL!!
But seriously, I totally agree - my customers deserve the BEST service and they deserve to be honored… but as business owners we can’t forget that we too deserve to be honored and respected in return - I mean, that’s just being a human, right? Love one another…
And ya know, this time I did feel relieved - instead of going down the road of beating myself up, I just stood my ground and said “you’re not going to treat me like this…” And it felt empowering.
Joyce - that story is priceless! It really hurts when someone tries to take credit for our creative work.
Once again - thank you all so much for the support on this - and especially the sharing. I know I’m not alone, and this is further validation that standing in my power feels goooood!
August 25th, 2008 at 1:39 pm (#)
What a great conversation going on! When a bump in the road of life or work happens I ask myself (sometimes there’s a lag time! lol) what was my part in all this? Looking from a perspective that I’m 100% responsible for what happens in my life–it gives me 100% of the ability to change, too.The idea of boundaries, no, the need for boundaries serves everyone. Now there is a difference between liking and serving. I had a client a few years back who didn’t give two business day notification when he cancelled his appointment as he was going to Las Vegas. Given he read and signed the appointment policy he was aware he was responsible to pay for the session. Problem was I didn’t set a boundary at the beginning of our work which was to have a credit card number on file. I sent him a bill with a SASE. That session was never paid for. But from that point on I did ask clients when they booked their appointments for a credit card number to hold their first appointment as I told them the appointment policy. I felt uneasy at the beginning but once I realized this was honoring my time the words flowed. And people provided me with their information without a complaint.
August 26th, 2008 at 12:52 am (#)
Jenn,
Sounds like there is an article, workbook, coaching session, or class in this: Exploring business and personal boundaries, or something of the kind. I’d want to read/attend it!
I certainly could identify with your experience, and it made me want to examine my own business boudaries.
Good on ya!